19 Things I've Learned from my Multi-Generational Women Friends

One thing I love about being involved in a community of faith is I have the opportunity to become friends with women of all different generations.

I have friends in their twenties who are just starting with marriage or parenting.I have friends in their eighties who are facing end of life issues.I have female friends who are single, divorced, married and widowed.No matter their age, they each have lessons to teach me.

Nineteen Things I've Learned 

From My Multi-generational Women Friends 

1. Women who have been married 50 years are still trying to figure out their husbands.

2. Women of all ages have auditioned for the position of God (some would call this control) and it hasn't turned out as they hoped.

3. Even when you are ninety, you will ask the question, "Does this outfit make me look fat?" (Sorry gals, it's true. My husband's 98-year-old grandmother hated to be weighed at the doctor's office and I remember thinking, Seriously, I don't get a pass, even when I'm almost a hundred?)

4. Nine times out of ten when asked for a prayer request, a woman, no matter her age, will ask prayer for a family member and not herself.

5. No matter your age, you will never have your act together, never do it perfectly and will never arrive. (Women sometimes then try #2, rather than admit they are human and accept their human limitations. I like to say, "Everyday I come to the end of myself and discover I need Christ." This is a good thing.

)6. Chocolate is a necessary addition at all female functions. Unfortunately, it leads to question #3 being asked more often.

7. No matter her age, all women wrestle with questions of tough love: Should I let the baby cry himself to sleep or pick him up? Should I let my daughter walk to school by herself? Is it time for my daughter to move out and live on her own? Should I let my forty-year-old son move back home or let him be homeless?

8. Favorite quote from my friend who is eighty: "My best years are still in front of me."

9. You can't have a group of women in a room together for thirty minutes before someone starts sharing their childbirth story. Complete with graphic details. This leads to number 10.

10. Women feel compelled to tell a pregnant woman every childbirth horror story, but nobody feels compelled to tell a new bride their honeymoon horror stories.

11. Women understand fat jeans. And skinny jeans.

12. As long as your mother is alive, you are her little girl.

13. The empty nest syndrome is real. PMS is real. Mid-life crisis is real. Postpartum depression is real. Menopause is real. Listening to women who have walked there is invaluable.

14. One more thing that is real. Forgiveness.

15. Women's lib has not been able to eliminate mommy guilt.

16. Burying a parent is difficult. It is a quadzillion billion times more difficult to bury a child. Or grandchild. 25 years later you might still cry when you recount the story.

17. White paint comes in many different shades. As do white shoes. Few guys understand this with the exception of the guy who works in the paint department at Home Depot.

18. Women of all ages have wisdom to share.

19. The verse in Titus 2 about older women encouraging younger women is true. (And sometimes it's not age, but experience.) Some of the best advice I've gleaned about being a mom, wife, friend and cancer survivor I've learned from these women, not from attending a seminar.

What lessons have you learned from the multi-generational friends in your life?

__________________________________

Update on Mom

Two more family members were here - Rory and Breezy from Colorado. During a marathon game day we convinced Mom to play dominoes with us and then had no pity. Mom placed last. She didn't threaten to remove us from her will, so all is good.

One of the perks of life in the big city is the food. Besides In and Out Burgers, we introduced Rory and Breezy to Betty's Paletas in downtown Chandler, jalapeno cheese bread from the Farmer's Market, Kevin's fresh-roasted Sumatran coffee, Katelyn's raspberry almond coffeecake, Kevin's lemon meringue pie, and make-your-own fajitas with homemade salsa.

Hurrah for food!! (Must go to gym later.)

Thanks to Jack and Laura for hosting Rory and Breezy and then filling their suitcase with lemons, oranges and grapefruits from their backyard trees.

Mom is supposed to have chemo again on Wednesday. Her recovery has been slow from the last round, so we will see what the doctor recommends.