The Lie I Tell Myself

When asked about his job as an air traffic controller for Kennedy International Airport, Stephen Abraham talked about the challenges of directing planes in the control tower.

In one hour, some of us may direct 100 planes taking off and landing. We’re supposed to keep them three, four or five miles apart when they’re in the air, depending on the size of the aircraft. They’re not supposed to be as close as 2.9 miles, or as far apart as 6.

The job of an air traffic controller is considered one of the most stressful jobs in the world.

Sometimes I think there is an air traffic controller living in my head.

Instead of planes, there are projects, responsibilities and deadlines waiting to land. My brain works to remember all the commitments and to keep them straight so they don't overlap on the calendar.

When the air traffic controller in my head gets overwhelmed, I have a coping mechanism.

I tell myself a lie.

And I believe it.

Every time.

The lie is this:

When (fill in the blank) is over, I will have more time.

this semester is over. When I finish this project. When the wedding is over. When Christmas is over. Then. Then I will have more time.

There is one major problem with this thought process: I forget that when one plane has successfully landed, there are six more planes circling.

There are ALWAYS planes waiting to land.

Time is NEVER going to magically appear on my calendar.

This is the hard truth. This is the truth I need to look at to combat the lie, because until I do, I will continue to allow more and more planes to circle around my life. When I need to make changes, they need to be made within the permimeter of this reality.

What about you? Do you tell yourself a similar lie?

Do you have an air traffic controller in your head?