I am an Introvert

I am an introvert.

This does not mean that I am a social recluse, a hermit or that I don't like people.

It just means:

1. I am energized by spending time alone.

2. I process and filter things internally (unlike many extroverts who process verbally.)

3. I value depth over breadth in conversations and relationships (I find long periods of chit-chat exhausting.)

I just finished reading Introverts in the Church by Adam S McHugh and found many of his words thought-provoking. I have read things about introverts vs extroverts before, but never in the context of church life. The author contends that many evangelical churches today value the doer over the thinker - which is not surprising in our fast-paced culture - leaving introverts struggling to catch their breath.

He writes that there have been seasons in the church where meditation and contemplation were valued, but today it seems that it’s as if the moment we surrender our lives to Christ we are issued a flashing neon sign that says “go!” There is a restless energy to evangelicalism that leads to a full schedule and a fast pace. Some have said that, in Christian culture, busyness in next to godliness. We are always in motion, constantly growing, ever expanding.

Psychology professor Richard Beck says, "Some churches equate spirituality with sociability." This can be challenging for introverts who are not interested in small talk, who are reluctant to approach strangers and whose inner processing slows them down for debates about faith. (I can always think of things I wish I would have said hours after a conversation is over.)

I remember offending one person in our church by not talking with her after the service. I had been at church early to practice a song list with the worship team, had dealt with the normal problems with the sound system and had led the congregation in singing that morning. By the time I stepped off the platform, I had a full-blown migraine coming on from too much external stimulation (the author calls it an introverted hangover.)

The woman did not complain to me personally, but talked with Kevin about it (no comment), to which he said, "It's not that Lynne didn't want to talk with you, it's that she didn't even see you." (I told Kevin this probably didn't help my case!)

I laugh about it now, because what my husband told the woman was true. There are times on a Sunday morning when I have given all that there is to give and I just need to go home and crash. I need to refuel by spending time alone. It doesn't mean that I get a "pass" in being with people, serving them, or leading a congregation - not that I would even want that, because I love our church and the people there. It just means that I need more time to myself and with God before I am ready to face the world again.More about that in my next blog.

So, introverts out there - how has life in the church been challenging for you?